John Barnard

THERE WILL COME A TIME WHEN YOU BELIEVE EVERYTHING IS FINISHED….

THAT WILL BE THE BEGINNING.

LOUIS L'AMOUR

I woke up in the sleeping quarters at work on Thursday morning after my final shift and I started packing up my sleeping bag and pillow as well as organising everything that had to be returned to the administrators. The last shift was a nightshift and I chose to sleep at work in order to catch the morning shift and say goodbye. I handed in my headset, cleaned out my locker and did the rounds. Up to the Tower and all along the hallways I said my goodbyes. My friend walked me out through security, I thanked him and handed him my access permit. I sat in my truck, quietly and let the engine run. After a few minutes I put it in first and slowly made my way out of the control centre parking lot for the last time. Never again will I work the Johannesburg Airspace and walk through those sliding doors. I was terrified, emotional and the finality of it all slowly settled into my mind. At least I could remind myself that I am not giving up my discipline and I knew I would be back controlling aircraft soon. Only in a different and often busier part of the world.

The last few weeks have been a rollercoaster of emotions. Farewells, breakfasts, barbecues and heartfelt conversations intertwined with mountains of admin and a to-do list that doesn’t seem to be getting any shorter. I got to see most of my closest friends, share a meal or a beer and got to say goodbye.. for now at least. My phone is filled with messages from my colleagues, friends and family wishing me well on the next adventure and I managed to save hundreds of photos, videos and memories to revisit when the days are long and desert becomes too lonely. I am humbled by every phone call, card, letter and gift and I am grateful for the opportunity to be a friend, colleague, instructor and family member to the incredible people in my orbit.

Today I cleared out room in the city, packed my bags and guitars and turned my truck south toward the farm. Ten minutes from the house on the highway on-ramp I got pulled over by a metro cop. He asked for my license and breathalysed me on the spot. What else ?? After he was satisfied that I’m not over the legal limit he mumbled something I couldn’t understand and impatiently signalled that I was free to go. I let out a sigh of relief and hit the highway out of the city. All the way my mind was spinning. The air was crisp and sapphire blue. In the distance bushfires were raging and I thought of the people that were busy fighting to keep them under control. The highway turned to two lane roads and with the red winter sun dipping below the Western horizon I finally turned onto the dirt road. I opened the windows and let the cool air rush over my face. The mountains of the Vredefort Dome surrounded me now and the winter grasses were gold and orange, the skies a dusty pink. In the distance, Tygerfontein came into view and my heart skipped a beat. The beauty always takes my breath away. I was home and done with Johannesburg, at least for the foreseeable future.

The next few weeks will be busy. My folks will be renewing their vows during an intimate ceremony in the same small church where they first saw each other as kids, raised a family and had the funeral services for their parents. A hundred and thirty years leave deep connections and memories and I feel fortunate to still have them both. I’ll be playing a few songs, be the master of ceremonies and we will celebrate more than forty years of marriage, companionship and commitment. Every day I’ll be getting up early, cold plunge in the cattle trough and do a workout. I’ll be studying and preparing for my new position in Doha and I will work on projects with my team on the farm. A lot of people depend on me to make a success of this and I have burnt the boats. I’m taking this seriously and I will work as hard as I can to make this endeavour a successful one.

Thank you for everyone’s support, advice, friendship and empathy. I’ll be out there playing songs and writing songs again soon. This is only the beginning.

JB